« Last post by betta fish on Yesterday at 04:28:25 PM »
My deepest condolences!
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Hi, rains. You've gotten a lot of great advice here, and I'm going to add my humble two cents.
Not having a family, even if it was a crappy one, is a terrible thing. Even when it's right to go NC, it's against our human nature to cut the ties. When you think about, then, you've been isolated in a way that is due to cause anxiety and depression.
Here's the other side of the coin: it's also a liberation. Once you start healing from it, you can fill your life with whatever and whomever you choose. And those things and people can be darn well anything. Isn't that fantastic in a way? There are no rules to your life now, nobody to tell you you're doing it wrong. You can cherry pick people you want in your life, and there are plenty of those who won't want to jump off a building like your mom.
Take your time. It hurts now and may hurt forever, but all of it gets smaller and father away from your day-to-day life.
And, NC doesn't have to be a final thing. You may find them coming in and out of your life, and it's all your choice. You may also realize that it's never going to be okay with them.
Big hug to you!