DH's sibling, who's about the file for bankruptcy, is divorced and moved in with NMIL, sent an email announcing changes to NMIL's Will: DH's brother will receive the bulk of NMIL's estate.
BIL is way out there in the toxic realm too. An emotionally healthy sibling wouldn't rub such a thing in a fellow siblings face. Nor would an emotionally healthy sibling condone such updates to the will that purposely exclude and alienate others.
It's feels like extreme enabling if you ask me. That she told me she "had to talk to DH about her Will," after she'd already talked to him about her Will the day before, suggests she wanted me to know that she was going to punish DH based on the stuff that happened during her visit this Spring/Summer. Wow, just wow.
The call to you was a covert, but very obvious means to inform you also!
I've been through similar crap w/ my toxic and dysfunctional parents in the past. But, even when I was in the FOG, I didn't condone the changing of the will BS talk. I knew it was just being spiteful on my parents part and would tell them I didn't want to hear about or be apart of it. Conversation over. Little did I know then that I was doing the healthy thing and not giving my parents the drama and supply they needed. They truly wanted me to side with them and pity them for the so-called petty slights (figments of their imagination) my siblings had done to them
The real gut buster is that my parents don't even have a legit will. Ironic considering how many times in the past they'd use it as a ploy to keep their offspring subservient, compliant,and utterly obedient. Yet, they still go on and on about the money they'll leave when they pass. Just grandiose narc talk and total exaggeration. Reality is they'll be no $$$, for my father has refused to plan for how my mother will be cared for when he passes. She'll likely go straight to assisted living for she's incapable of living on her own, so what ever remains of the estate will go toward her care.
Personally, I'm at peace with the fact I'll never see a dime when my parents pass. I view it as tainted blood money and I don't want any part of dirty mafia money! Once upon a time I would have kissed the Don's ring, but I'm out of the family business so to speak....LOL