« Last post by Livingoneggshells on Today at 02:57:40 PM »
Whiteheron omg really? That is really strange, how did you react to that the first time?
Some of them I believe see us as props to help them appear normal to the outside world. Once they have us in place, and we are securely under their thumb, there is no reason to try and connect with us through genuine conversation, asking about our thoughts and feelings, etc. IMO we are like pets to them.
This was exactly the dynamic with my stbx. I made him look great to the outside world. And that was all I was good for. For the last 10 years of our marriage, we could be literally in the middle of a conversation and he would make a phone call to someone -- and start a long chit-chatting conversation with them. Or he'd start doing something on the computer or start crushing videos. It didn't matter how many times I told him this bothered me, he did it anyway. In the car, he'd turn off the radio when I was listening to something I really liked (which he absolutely knew was the case.) He invited people to come for holidays, birthdays, etc and stay for days, expecting me to do all the entertaining. I was expected to drop everything to take his calls, do his errands, and listen to whatever he had to say with rapt attention.
It was very clear that I was little more than a servant to him. My needs were not ever as important as his. Not surprising that when I left, he barely communicated with me. Why would he? I was just another example of the lazy, unappreciative employees he's always had. I'm sure he's got a new me doing his bidding. God help her!