« Last post by Long Time on Today at 12:55:49 PM »
I agree with the other posters here. It's about control, and when they sense that they are losing that, look out.
When I was still in the house with my ex, after I filed, waiting until the house sold, these are some of the things that happened.....
I NEVER would have thought mine would become physically violent, but he dumped liquid soap in the pot of coffee one morning. (I was the coffee drinker in the house, and I KNOW that there was no way I would have left that much "soap residue" in the pot.) And also, when I went to sip the coffee, I said "eww....what happened?" And his reply? "Yeah, I thought it tasted funny too, so I dumped mine out." Now why on earth would he wait for me to taste mine without saying anything to me?
Then a day later, he dumped alcohol in with a shower oil that I used daily after showering. That was scary and really screwed up. I was finished my shower, went to apply the oil, smelled the alcohol, started to shake because I felt I was being attacked. I exited the bathroom to the stereo BLARING (it was 7 a.m.,) and once I entered the bedroom found that he cleared off the dresser except for a Maya Angelou quote left in the center. I was totally freaked out. Long story short, but I did go to the police, a car chase with him ensued, and he ended up coming to the police station claiming that I was following him all morning. Officers said, "that's impossible, sir, she has been here with us." Surreal.
I would never, in my wildest imagination, think that someone could act in that way. He snapped that morning, and I think that even a person in their right mind, who is on the receiving end of the breakup, (which he was because I was the "initiator" of the divorce,) might be sad and despondent, but even with that, normal people don't act that way.
I guess I am just sharing this with you to be cautious that you just never know with a PD, what they are thinking, and how "normal" their actions seem to them. What you DO know about a PD is that they usually have a very difficult time dealing with stress or situations that are stressful. Divorce is very stressful, so it is anyone's guess how a PD will react to that.
Involving the police was the one thing I was so afraid to do, and if it wasn't for my girlfriend (an Angel,) on the phone with me the morning of the shower oil incident, repeating..."drive to the police...I'm here on the phone...I won't hang up until you are there..just keep driving...put the car in that direction..." I would never have done that. After that first time, though, it was so easy to call them the second time when I needed. It also gave me written records, which proved to be invaluable later.
Stay on guard, stay strong, and DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT, hesitate to call the police in a moment if you feel the least bit afraid or threatened. At best, they will tell him to leave the house for the night.
I am sorry to hijack a little...but I just wanted to use my experiences as a cautionary tale for you...