Recommendations regarding Social Anxiety

[theKatcameback]

I don't understand why I do this but every time I am in a social event I typically enjoy myself (on edge but manage to get through it - I actually like most people, I just don't trust them) but the next day I agonize over everything I said and I did.  I feel sick and the black cloud of doom hits me.  I can barely function.  I try to force myself to go to events because practice makes perfect, right?!?  LOL I'm 50.   I constantly wish I was dead....I do not share that with anyone (I'm not an attention seeker) CBT doesn't really work - works great for quitting smoking, but that's about it.  Any suggestions.  I won't kill myself I have children that are dependant on me and I really don't want to make them as damage as me....however I wish I was dead runs pretty much on a loop....

[Three Roses]

Hello and welcome to you, Kat! Sure sounds familiar to me, the same thing happens to me whenever I go out. I'm pretty sure it's my inner critic, ripping me apart for every perceived social infraction. I can combat this by doing work around the inner critic and/or outer critic, and going thru Pete Walker's 13 steps for managing an emotional flashback (EF).

Pete's 13 steps can be found here - http://pete-walker.com/13StepsManageFlashbacks.htm


Best of luck to you and thanks for joining!

[BlancaLap]

Mmmmm... social anxiety can be explained by dissociation and emotional numbness. Do you think it may be your case?

[Rainagain]

Hi kat,
I have the exact same thing.

I feel terrible the next day, as if I have committed some sort of crime.

I tried to explain it to a psych and all I could come up with is that I am friendly and sociable and people seem to like me but the next day I realise I am not that person and people will think I am friendly and OK when I'm not.

Its as if I have let my guard down, let people get too close or lost control in some way.

Its really unpleasant, I tend to avoid seeing people I like and who clearly like me because of this 'day after' feeling.

I didn't know others had this too, its a really distressing feeling. I feel shamed and literally shout and swear at myself over nothing.

I don't know about inner critics and haven't read up on stuff, I just know it hurts.