Decision making

[barbidoll]

So I am having trouble with making decisions. For instance, someone suggested to me a year ago to apply for ssdi for my child who was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I keep going back and forth on it and it keeps me from acting. A week ago it was suggested I apply for myself and I keep second guessing it. Then today someone else suggested it. At first today I felt like okay I can do this and then within a half hour I start questioning myself and doubting. Does anyone else do this?

[JamesG]

very much,  with me it stems from the fact that I had interferance and control on every aspect of my life and I just can't get it into my head I'm now in control.... we are tho, we so are.

[Lilfae]

Yeah, I  go back and forth alot too. And sometimes it's just easier if someone else can make the desicion for me. That way I know, if I react strongly and negatively towards their desicion, it is the other one I should do.

But most of the time I write down a double pro/con list. ( As in pro/con for doing the thing and pro/con for not doing the thing). Sometimes this helps find clarity, especially if I start with the facts and end with the emotion.

[JamesG]

I find it helps to realise that a lot of people who claim to know better, make some lousy decisions. We do the best we can, we are not perfect, but so long as we make decisions based upon the best information we have and not for reasons of fear or ego, we can't do any better really.

[AphoticAtramentous]

The fact that I couldn't answer this when I first read it because I was thinking; "Kinda? Maybe? No, yes... I dunno, probably? Eh." is probably a good indication that I have trouble making decisions, haha.
I just can't really remember any good examples off the top of my head.

[barbidoll]

Thank you for all the replies.  I feel kind of crazy when I am waffling back and forth. It helps to know that I am not the only one.  I still have contact with my abusers because I have children with them which I don't think helps. Trying to figure out how I can protect myself more and get myself help to work through all my trauma.