Trauma Statement

[Dee]

I was in group the other day (went back after talking to facilitator) and the facilitator talked about trauma statements.  I was the only one who had not done this.  She was saying it is very powerful and very validating this.  I would never do this without input from my therapist because she knows what I am ready for.  I am the only one who is not the facilitator's client.

She broke up years and said to do them for each time frame:
0-6
6-12
12-18
11-24...etc

I didn't ask questions, but I was wondering if anyone has done this?  One person mentioned writing memories on strips of paper then putting it together.  Is it a detailed account or just matter of fact?  Just curious if anyone has done this and if it was helpful?

[sanmagic7]

i haven't done this, dee, so don't know the particulars.  off the top of my head, tho, i could see it as being very validating for yourself, acknowledging that it was traumatic instead of 'not so bad', and giving you a breakdown as to what you went through and when. 

i also think it may be something to be done piece by piece, as it could be difficult and pretty emotionally packed.  give yourself a break when you need it, do something you enjoy, some kind of brain distraction, like cleansing your palette after each course.  working with your therapist on this is a great idea.

best to you with this, sweet dee.  slowly and small steps.  that's how we make our best progress.

[Three Roses]

I have not heard of this until now. 

[Max]

Hi Dee,
I have done something similar in a small group.  We made a timeline of what we felt as 'major events' in our life. Not with detail, but in bullet format.  Mine was pretty long because of my age and experiences.  It was very helpful because many I had forgotten.  Those upsetting events that get passed over in life for various reasons. We then would take turns and share what was on our timeline with a bit more detail.  That too was helpful, getting validation from others for what we went through.  It was the first time someone said to me that what had happened to me was not ok.  I will never forget that and it meant so much.

Sanmagic, you're correct.  It can be overwhelming trying to cover what for me was lifetime in one shot.  But well worth it.  I agree about doing pieces at a time. 

If you do it Dee, please let us know how it goes...if it is helpful or not. Take care of you.

[woodsgnome]

I did something similar to what you've described, Dee. Given my background in theatre, I devised a timeline almost as if I were writing a theatrical script based on one person's (mine) biography; even gave titles to the different years--e.g. voyage of discovery, new horizons/old pains, falling back/forward, and all kinds of variants like those.

I did those regularly, and found them useful at first--especially at times when I wasn't in "live" therapy. They did help sort out some of what had occurred; albeit so painful at times as to set off self-generated EFs/triggers. Which is why, Dee, I concur with your thinking that "I would never do this without input from my therapist because she knows what I am ready for."

The timelines did, however, help sort out how the traumas often filtered into so much of my ongoing story--personality, reactions, people fears, etc. I now refer to those as episodes from my old movie; powerful, emotional, but if I blink my eyes I realize the projector is turned off, the house lights are dimmed, and I'm in my new movie. I've found that a lot of metaphor/symbolism works best in my tries to find a recovery mode that I feel comfortable with.

Nowadays, I've been in therapy long enough that it all comes to mind when needed, I don't find the timelines as useful for the new 'living' script I'm writing with my daily life now.

Without reference to a timeline, the recalls still happen anyway, like EF's always do. An awful one came to me in therapy just the other day that has set in motion some bad memories which will probably form part of the next therapy session. We'll take that past recall and my T will probably skillfully weave that memory into how it affects me now, and how I can move on from here with it. Like the movie example, it might involve a mini-ritual, such as writing out the memory and then disposing of it in the shredder.

So, bottom line--back when I was fleshing out how my experiences unfolded, timelines helped me look back on my life's progress as well as its fallbacks. This is not so true now, for reasons I noted above. 

[radical]

Thanks Dee,
I would find this overwhelming in a group situation, but I can see the value of it in putting our lives and difficulties in perspective.  I intend to do this over the next couple of days because I have found journaling helps give me a perspective that my own mind doesn't allow.  Sometimes it is immensely useful to read back over the last week to have a better picture of where I am right now, because so often, I can't see the forest for the trees, and I get lost.

I think I'll do the same for what was valuable to me during those time frames, during the worst, how I survived, but also the people I loved, and who cared, and the things I loved.  For example, for me, emotional neglect as a child allowed me a lot of freedom when I was away from my parents (which was most of the time) and there are things about that freedom and hanging out with other kids, or in my own imagination (or both), that I feel very grateful for when I see kids who are so enmeshed with their parents and the adult world, and so busy doing "useful", conventionally educational things with every moment of the day, that they miss out on being a kid.

I think I'll keep away from specific memories and stick to brief summaries of what was happening, but this is just a summary for myself,  it might be good to talk about specific memories.

In a group, I'd be very uncomfortable about comparisons with other people's lives and feeling ashamed and judged. It always seems that there becomes a group average or norm and feeling too far outside of it in any direction, is uncomfortable for me.  Fitting into any group, (or feeling like I do), has always been a big problem for me.