If you are reading this, chances are your life has been touched in some way by a person who suffers from a personality disorder.
We created Out of the FOG because we know the isolation that comes from trying to cope with a family member or partner who suffers from a personality disorder. We remember the feeling of relief the first time we discovered that we were not alone. It's our hope that you will share this relief and find this material helpful in learning how to cope with your own situation.
We originally created Out of the FOG as a website, because we recognized the value of the internet in reaching a diverse global group of people who might never browse self-help section of a library or local bookstore. Every day, there are people all around the world browsing our site, learning about personality disorders from the unique point of view of family members, spouses and partners. Now that the content at Out of the FOG is being released as an e-book, we hope to bring this information to an even broader group of people.
If you are currently struggling to cope because a loved-one or family member suffers from a personality disorder, we leave you with this final word:
It's not your fault. It never was. Personality disorders are psychiatric conditions which cause people to behave in destructive ways. It never was, nor could be, the responsibility of a spouse, child, parent, sibling or friend of a personality disordered individual to change them, cure them or control them. Until a cure is developed, the reality of personality disorders will have to be acknowledged and managed in a way that protects immediate family members, while providing the personality disordered individual with an option to work on their own behavior and improve their own situation.
You're not alone. There are millions like us who have dealt with or are dealing with abusive behaviors. Surround yourself with smart, supportive people who understand what you are going through and will give you sound advice. It's too much to handle on your own.
It gets better. We don't have a cure for a personality disorder, but with the support of others we have learned how to protect ourselves from abuse and dramatically improve the quality of our own lives. Every day we are joined at the Out of the FOG website by others who are looking to do the same. Understanding more about personality disorders gives you a toolbox of ideas to stop reacting haphazardly and learn to respond in a more effective, constructive way whenever someone tries to mistreat you.
If you would like to learn more or to join our online support group, visit the Out of the FOG website at:
If you suspect you may have a family member or loved-one who suffers from a personality disorder, we encourage you to learn all you can and surround yourself with support as you learn how to cope.
August 25, 2014 - OOTF announce an exciting new development - it's called Out of the Storm - a support site specifically designed for people who suffer from CPTSD - Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. At OOTF we have often welcomed members who are dealing with CPTSD as a consequence of having been in a relationship with someone who suffers from a personality disorder. Nevertheless, for a long time we have recognized that CPTSD sufferers have a distinct and unique set of concerns and issues.
Nov 9, 2013 - OOTF has just launched a new "Future Goals" forum. This forum is a safe place to store your goals of what you would like to achieve. Setting goals can help us move forward, and give us something to focus on while we are working our way through day to day issues. Goals can change, be amended or added to over time as we either achieve them, or determine new goals as our lives unfold.